Last night, while writing Banshee, I noticed that I had subconsciously switched to English even for my fictional – or deeply personal – writing.
Moving away from your mother tongue to express feelings close to your soul is a huge step. No matter how well you speak a foreign language, the nuances are different and you might have problems finding the right tone, phrase or even the right word – which would come naturally to you while using your native language.
On the other hand, most of my communication over the last years, even decades, has been primarily in English. And more often than not, the English expression for something comes to my mind first, because my brain is by now wired to communicate and even think in that language.
It still feels a bit weird, though. And also a bit sad. Truth be told, German is a much more powerful language than English. Words just have stronger meanings. German is a better language to express emotional depth. It is also more precise. I love my mother tongue.
But English is what the world speaks. At least in our time. I have no doubt in my mind that this will move to Chinese and Russian over the course of the next decades for geopolitical and economical reasons. The axis of power is shifting. But by the time those powers have fully risen, I probably won’t be alive anymore, so the cultural and political change that has already started is of little significance for me personally.
The world I live and work in speaks English. It’s only logical to use English as my primary language for everything.